As many of you know, my family and I went to Long Beach, California for the Junior Olympics with our youngest daughter competing. We hadn’t been on a family vacation in a long time and decided this trip could serve two functions.
The fun began on the way there. I posted about this on facebook, but I had to include it here as a permanent record of my warped sense of humor. We’re driving on the freeway and a taxi pulls up to us in the right lane. Okay, no big deal, until I see the name of the taxi service. Then, I giggled and a whole scene unfolded in my movie camera brain of mine. Here’s a picture of the taxi similar to what I saw…
The name was NOT Aurora Cab, however, it was called ALTERNATIVE TAXI. Now, some of you went down the more risque path when envisioning how my SNL sketch in my head went. But I just went for pure punny in my funny. This is what I envisioned:
ME: Why yes, thank you. Please take me to the Art Museum.
TAXI DRIVER: Well, you see, I can’t do that. But I can take you to the Mall.
ME: You’re a taxi driver. You’re supposed to take me where I need to go.
TAXI DRIVER: Ma’am, did you read the name of my company? It’s Alternative Taxi. You tell me where you want to go, and I take you to alternative places.
ME: Okay, then. Can you take me to the Mall?
TAXI DRIVER: Ah, no. But I can take you to the Art Museum.
Wednesday, after the competition ended for Youngest (6th place in nation for Tumbling, 12th place in nation for Double Mini), we drove to Venice Beach. Now, hubby’s been there before and said we gotta go there at least once in our lives. The fun continued as we drove around looking to park. Imagine, if you will, because it’s hard to believe this really happened…
We pull down a side street and there is an older man riding his Jazzy scooter in the middle of the street. Hubby slows down, of course, so as not to hit the man. What do you expect to happen? Right! The man would ride over to the side to get out of our way. WRONG! He decides that he OWNS the road and proceeds to swerve to the right and left, down the center of the road so we must follow him until the end of the block.
We sat, incredulous, laughing at the audacity of this man. Well, we also happened to be passing a skateboard park on our left, and I catch the eye of a woman sitting watching the whole Mr. Bean or Monty Python sketch unfolding before her, and she is laughing hysterically, which made me laugh even harder. We finally reached the corner and he, thankfully, headed straight where we needed to turn.
Venice Beach, for those who haven’t been yet, is a very, shall we say, INTERESTING place to visit. We have the ocean off in the distance, lots of sand, some grassy areas, and a concrete boardwalk flanked with a workout zone (MUSCLE BEACH), tennis and paddle ball courts, skate park, and other fenced in sports to one side and tons of vendors of all kinds on the other.
This is where we ate a yummy lunch and listened to music. We sat right by the fence so we could people watch…
And then we came to a slew of these places…
Eldest was hysterical and took pictures. She’d written a persuasive essay about the legalization of marijuana last year. And we were hysterical, too, as guys wearing green scrubs and costumes were going around trying to drum up business. One guy looked at me and said, “Mama stress? We can help!”
Oh, I’m sure you could…